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Talk:Ad Nauseam, Ad Mortem, Ad Infinitum/@comment-26193563-20150612193925
Yay, the admin-est of all time starts off my critique career with this story, which I just read yesterday! XD But, enough of me being an immature bastard. Let's kick off this review. WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!!! As all reviews start, I go along with the title first. Naturally, "Ad Nauseam, Ad Mortem, Ad Infinitum" makes no sense, so searching them up they mean "extensive stuff to the point of nausea, to death, to infinity," respectively. These words symbolize something dark, and the fact that the writer bothered to serach this up in latin phrases gets credit for it. A brief summary: this young person has the ability of seeing ghosts, realizes the afterlife is just repetance of last moments, and when he accidentally crashes and kills a young boy, he is haunted by the boy's last moments and will be forever. Now, to start reviewing. The grammar and spelling are spot-on (although I did have to correct a few words), so no trouble here. The story: part I, "Ad Nauseam." The little signs of haunting, like creakings of floorboards, etc. This means the ghost of the lonely girl has been walking around a bit. A question: why did the girl hang herself? Was it because she was lonely? Shouldn't her loneliness be more thorough, as it became so dire to resort to the solution of suicide? When the narrator sees the ghost, he doesn't know it's one. When he finally realizes what it is, shouldn't he show much, much more shock? First, most people don't believe in ghosts. The problem with many pastas is that the narrator just calmly takes on the situation without batting any eye. The narrator can't touch the ghost, only feel the sensation. This directly counters the fact that the ghost is a bit corporal, able to creak the floorboards and shift the doors. This section, however, builds up a strong foundation for the rest of the story. Firm backup and pretty much no plot holes, it was pretty good. Moving to part II, "Ad Mortem." I liked how the writer manages to twirl the story around, never letting the readers know what killed the grandfather until the end. However, how does he know it? The short paragraph stating what the narrator saw was way too vague. Why did the mother kill the grandfather? Did he aggravate, irritate, vex, swear, workpile on her? Was it too much effort taking care of him and the mother was too lazy? Did she just not like him? It's mentioned that the relationship between the mother and grandfather were the best, so why would she smother him? Although it is VERY disturbing to think that your beloved egg donor killed your sperm donor's father in cold blood. What annoys me a bit is the excessive drinking. You're telling me there was no other way the narrator could have gotten over this crap. That he was such a bitch, just drinking away and away. Maybe the reasons for the grandfather's death was creepy, but the narrator's just an ass. Lastly, we have part III: "Ad Infinitum." This narrator now has been drinking into oblivion. The fault this section has is the very obvious out coming of the boy's death. When the narrator mentions his car hitting somehting, and the boy's disappearance, it doesn't take an asshat like me to piece up the things in a jiffy (one-sixtieth of a second). The narrator's now a wreck, which is where he was heading for anyway. Since he killed the boy, he is now stuck in the loop of the boy' death. It is a bit tragic to think, that the boy was so young and died at the hands (car) of this bastard. It's actually enraging for me. He didn't deserve to die. As punishment, the narrator's guilt consumes him from the inside, forever. So, wrapping it up! I thought it was a pretty superb story, didn't get bored one bit, not really thata creepy but excellent quality! The few plot holes I mention dock some points from a perfect, but this story I would read again if I had time to. This story deserves more attention, it's so underrated. 9/10